Vijay: Sure! I'll do it!
Y: WE will do it. But this time, I think we should reverse the order. We should bathe her first and then massage her. It will help her sleep better.
Vijay: (Scoffing sounds) Why? That's not how we do it.
Y: And who is this 'we'?
Vijay: Uhhh...it just doesn't make sense. See, first we should massage her, then we clean off the oil with a sponge bath.
Y: But I've checked -it says everywhere I've read that we should be massaging her after the bath.
Vijay (challengingly): Where have you read this?
Y (soft voice): On the Johnson's Baby Oil bottle ...(louder voice) but I'm sure I read it elsewhere too. Anyway, it makes sense, doesn't it? A bath is invigorating, a massage is relaxing...so we massage her later.
Vijay (argumentative tone): But I always feel sleepy after a bath.
Y: What's wrong with you? Don't you bathe in the morning to get fresh?
Vijay (sagaciously): Bathing makes you only momentarily fresh. I am always sleepy by 11 a.m. in office.
Y (Withering look): Hmmm. Don't be so silly, please.
(Silence.
As always, Only momentary)
Vijay (Having thought about it for a bit) Look here, Y. Water makes you tired. After all, don't you feel tired after a swim?
Y (now losing it): Stop. Are you really going to equate a half hour swim with a 5 minute sponge bath?
(Vijay retreats while Y prepares the bath and massage material, both in a sullen mood. A few moments later, Vijay re-enters the battlefield with gusto, playing his final trump card)
Vijay ( Spits out, in his 'I'm the man of this house' voice): I want one more baby!
Y (Stares dumbfoundedly, cannot get any words out): ...
Vijay: And I will do whatever I want, my way, with that one. Come on, then!
(And for once, the husband has the last word. What can you possibly say to a man like this?)
This is Peanut about to be sponged. She looks most bemused while her father sings, as untunefully and loudly as ever:
'Har Har Gange...
Pandit Ji, Nange...'
The old, old way was to vigorously massage the baby first, kneeding her and twisting and bending her limbs, roast her in the sun for a bit, bring her indoors to cool down a bit and then bathe her.
ReplyDeleteSounds rather like cooking meat, would you say?
We don't do the sun thing much these days, but I doubt if five minutes of soaking in Vitamin D would do any harm.
I used to massage them out in the sun, (about 10 minutes) bring them in and bathe them in hottish water.
Johnson Baby Oil is a good mosturiser for after the bath, so your baby gets another 2-minute (very gentle this time) massage. That really relaxes her.
But you'll discover what's right for your baby, all on your own, in your own time, so don't worry.
Another baby? For Dad to handle exclusively?
ReplyDeleteFlabber was never so gasted
We also oiled,sunned, and then bathed the offspring. Used to use baby lotion afterwards, sometimes- not always.
ReplyDeleteEvening baths I guess could be followed with a baby lotion massage.
Such tiny babies usually don't/can't sleep through the night- they are usually hungry or wet or worse at frequent intervals. Just try and sleep whenever Peanut doeszzzzzz.
hahahaha - most amused at vijay's idea. two parents fighting over how to best raise peanut. she's lucky i guess - even if you are one of the two :)
ReplyDeleteIm Hooked :D
ReplyDeleteoil and massage.. roast in the sun.. then bathe.
ReplyDeletebut we bathe our babies at night after a good old massage and then put some lotion and thats when they pass out. so do we.
Hahaha! I cant get over how Vijay has so many inputs on these little things which, according to old fashioned thinking, are a woman's "domain"! Its too cute and very funny! I love the child division idea! You do what you want with this one, and I do what I want with the other! :) So logical, eh?! :)
ReplyDeleteIf you want to massage after bath and Peanuts sweats as much after oiling as The Bhablet does, I suggest a baby powder massage. Lotion seems to rub in too fast, and if I put in lots he sweats anyway.
ReplyDeletePowder works very well for a post-bath, pre-bedtime massage.
Well, two kids and several baths later, massage - bath - feed is the best order for a peaceful nap. Looking forward to seeing you all this evening.
ReplyDelete